I'll be the first to admit I know as much about hockey as Ben Roethlisberger knows about bathroom etiquette.

I don't watch anything hockey related until the puck drops for the Stanley Cup Playoffs. I can identify one penalty (icing) when it happens and I can pronounce (maybe) the names of four players on the Red Wings' roster.

I do know this much, though: after the first two days of the Cup playoffs, with all the early-game upsets that have taken place, NHL Commissioner Gary Bettman has to be having serious anxiety issues.

The winners of the President's Trophy - the Washington Capitals - dropped game one at home Thursday night against Montreal, 3-2, in overtime on a night where the best player in the league, Washington's Alex Ovechkin, was held without a shot on goal for just the fourth time in his career.

The reigning Cup champs, Pittsburgh, which features the league's most marketable player, Sidney Crosby, on Wednesday fell behind, 1-0, to Ottawa.

On the other side of the bracket, the San Jose Sharks, the One Seed in the West, lost their opening game to Colorado.

And the Wings, opening the playoffs on the road for the first time since cell phones were as big as laptops, lost in Phoenix late Wednesday.

It's too early to say each of these squads is in trouble, but for the league's sake - and Bettman's heart health, all four need to turn things around quickly.

Sports have always served as a distraction for fans.

Watching a football game can, for a little while, make people forget what ails them.

Not around here. Not this fall.

The last couple months have been awful for fans of local teams. I've gotten to the point that I'd rather watch a Maury Povich marathon than watch a football game featuring one of our teams.

The University of Michigan has pulled an MSU: start fast and fade.

The Spartans have performed well below expectations (not mine, though) and will be lucky to play in a bowl game.

And the Lions have been, well, the Lions.

Fast forward to hockey and basketball season, and the Pistons, while they'll be entertaining, likely won't make the playoffs. And the area's one consistently really good franchise, the Red Wings, stumbled out of the gate (tied for second in the Central Division with Chicago, one point behind Columbus) and will be in a fight all year to make hockey's second season.

I know it's extremely early in the game, but if the playoffs started this weekend, fans of the two Detroit teams that have seen the most success in recent years would have to find a second squad to root for because their hometown team would be watching postseason action at Bdubs with the rest of us.

Things could get much better, though, come winter.

The Spartan men's hoops team is ranked second in the nation (behind Kansas, a team MSU beat twice last season) in both the Associated Press and Coaches polls. Michigan's hoop squad is ranked 15th in both polls, as the Wolverines will look to build on last season's trip to the Big Dance - their first since 1998.

So there may be some light at the end of this long tunnel, but right now, being a Detroit sports fan is about as fun as watching DVR'd episodes of NOVA on a Saturday night.